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Mark Twain Stories and Speeches

Stories by Mark Twain - aka Samuel Clements

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mark twains first appearance
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new york press club dinner
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old fashioned printer
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osteopathy
AUTHORS' CLUB

          ADDRESS AT THE DINNER GIVEN IN HONOR OF MR. CLEMENS, LONDON,
          JUNE, 1899

          Mr. Clemens was introduced by Sir Walter Besant.

It does not embarrass me to hear my books praised so much.  It only
pleases and delights me.  I have not gone beyond the age when
embarrassment is possible, but I have reached the age when I know how to
conceal it.  It is such a satisfaction to me to hear Sir Walter Besant,
who is much more capable than I to judge of my work, deliver a judgment
which is such a contentment to my spirit.

Well, I have thought well of the books myself, but I think more of them
now.  It charms me also to hear Sir Spencer Walpole deliver a similar
judgment, and I shall treasure his remarks also.  I shall not discount
the praises in any possible way.  When I report them to my family they
shall lose nothing.  There are, however, certain heredities which come
down to us which our writings of the present day may be traced to.
I, for instance, read the Walpole Letters when I was a boy.  I absorbed
them, gathered in their grace, wit, and humor, and put them away to be
used by-and-by.  One does that so unconsciously with things one really
likes.  I am reminded now of what use those letters have been to me.

They must not claim credit in America for what was really written in
another form so long ago.  They must only claim that I trimmed this,
that, and the other, and so changed their appearance as to make them seem
to be original.  You now see what modesty I have in stock.  But it has
taken long practice to get it there.

But I must not stand here talking.  I merely meant to get up and give my
thanks for the pleasant things that preceding speakers have said of me.
I wish also to extend my thanks to the Authors' Club for constituting me
a member, at a reasonable price per year, and for giving me the benefit
of your legal adviser.

I believe you keep a lawyer.  I have always kept a lawyer, too, though I
have never made anything out of him.  It is service to an author to have
a lawyer.  There is something so disagreeable in having a personal
contact with a publisher.  So it is better to work through a lawyer--and
lose your case.  I understand that the publishers have been meeting
together also like us.  I don't know what for, but possibly they are
devising new and mysterious ways for remunerating authors.  I only wish
now to thank you for electing me a member of this club--I believe I have
paid my dues--and to thank you again for the pleasant things you have
said of me.

Last February, when Rudyard Kipling was ill in America, the sympathy
which was poured out to him was genuine and sincere, and I believe that
which cost Kipling so much will bring England and America closer
together.  I have been proud and pleased to see this growing affection
and respect between the two countries.  I hope it will continue to grow,
and, please God, it will continue to grow.  I trust we authors will leave
to posterity, if we have nothing else to leave, a friendship between
England and America that will count for much.  I will now confess that
I have been engaged for the past eight days in compiling a publication.
I have brought it here to lay at your feet.  I do not ask your indulgence
in presenting it, but for your applause.

Here it is:  "Since England and America may be joined together in
Kipling, may they not be severed in 'Twain.'"



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